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The Tenth Day.

The tenth day  after a death  is more significant in my husband's community than I had realised.  My rakhi brother Ramana had mentioned the tenth day when we were chatting, and I said no, in our community it is the thirteenth.  But Ramana is an Indian and I am not.  He knows much more about this culture than I do.

Sure enough, this morning my husband, his brothers and my nephew, basically every male who participated in the cremation had to shave all the hair off their heads.  Well, strictly speaking, only the eldest brother who lit the pyre had to shave completely.  He is bald now, and all facial hair has disappeared.  It is hard to notice the difference as he has covered his hair against the cold.

Yash my husband has had his beard and moustache shaved off and his hair cut very short.  As he didn't light the funeral pyre, he wasn't obliged to go bald.  Just as well.  I haven't seen him without his moustache in over twenty years.  He usually grows a beard in winter and shaves it off in summer.

It is amazing just how much my husband resembles my relatives back home in Ireland.  I read once somewhere that we subconsciously pick spouses on the basis of their reminding us of our blood relatives.  It is certainly true in my case.  The shaven Yash closely resembles three of my mother's brothers.

Isn't it amazing?


  1. There seem to be so many rituals involved compared to back home in Ireland. Mind you shaved heads are quite fashionable here these days.

    I find it fascinating that you see such a resemblance to your uncles.

  2. Nevertheless, this must be very difficult for you and your husbands family.
    Yes, I have heard the same - in fact, when you look at couples, some of the resemble each other as well actually. And I have heard the same goes for dogs and their owners as well.;)

  3. This was fascinating, especially the bit about Yash looking like your family...

  4. I just heard it tonight on the telly! Amazing... I should check the next time I fall for someone...

  5. That is interesting! To me, one of the most attractive ballheaded man is the actor Billy Zane. He starred in several movies, but Return of the Mummy might be one you watched.

  6. how funny that he resembles them.

  7. Marie - It's nice that being bald is fashionable, at least for people who are bald.

    Zuzana - I am so amazed to find that this is true - must be psychological.

    Anna - I love your new photo

    ...daisy... - It's worth looking into all right!

    Judy - I think I saw Billy Zane in 'Titanic' but he had hair then!

    Michelle - It's something to think about all right!


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